How the quality of our thinking impacts our lives and those around us too.
Have you ever heard the expression - your thinking creates your reality, and doubted it?
In life there is an old saying which goes something like ‘You get out of life what you put into it’. That’s certainly a phrase that I’ve lived by over the years, however I used to oversimplify this. I used to think it was all about working hard.
These days I realise it’s not as simple as that. It’s about a whole host of things. I also recognise that it very much applies to our thinking and in particular how we choose to think.
It's important to take stock every now and then and make sure we’re on the right track. We need to challenge ourselves and work at having positive thoughts, choosing not to worry and always trying to look for the up-side in situations.
Sometimes this can be tough, but no one else can do it for us. It’s 100% our responsibility to choose the way we think. Now that itself might sound a little simplistic, but it’s a fact. When we think clearly, without worry and with an open mind, we act more positively and usually get better outcomes.
If we don’t get the exact outcome we’re after, because we were in a positive frame of mind, we’re also much more likely to be satisfied with the outcome we get, drawing positives from the experience, regardless of how things turn out.
Let me explain more with an anecdote.
I want you to imagine that there are two salespeople. Both are successful and are working for a company which has 5 regional offices and 200 sales staff around the country. Unknown to them, the company’s leadership team have been planning an award ceremony for salesperson of the year. They're holding an event where two people from each regional office will be invited to attend.
The prize is a 2-day break on a Thursday and Friday at 5-star luxury hotel spa on the banks of Loch Lomond in Scotland. The guests would be wined and dined and entertained by the company’s top team and have full use of the Spa facilities. There will also be an awards dinner and presentation made to the top salesperson of the year.
Now imagine these two scenarios
Scenario 1
Joe from the Newcastle office is thrilled. He’s delighted to have been recognised and is excited about the event. It’s two weeks away so he’s got plenty of time to make sure that he has someone looking after his customers and territory while he’s away. He thinks that two days off work over and above his holidays is a real treat.
He’s thought about it and will need to leave early to make the most of the hotel facilities. He’s also thinking if he does this, he’ll be able to enjoy the run up to Scotland on lovely country roads, listening to some nice tunes and enjoying the scenery. He’s even thought about taking a break at the Scottish Border and is planning to take a selfie to send it to his wife and daughter.
The event is in August so the weather around the loch should be stunning. They’ll be able to hopefully have drinks outside on a warm summer evening with spectacular scenery. It will be a great opportunity to meet the top management team personally and get to know colleagues from the other offices in a relaxed atmosphere. He's looking forward to getting to know Bob who's also been invited from the Newcastle team.
Joe also loves the idea of getting some time in the spa – some “well-earned me time” to unwind after what has been a hard year of sales campaigning. And then there’s the excitement of possibly being salesperson of the year. What a thrill - the opportunity of being number one.
Scenario 2
Bob thinks that he’s only been invited to make the numbers up and to keep Joe company. He’s really busy at the moment and even with a fortnight until the event, it’s two precious days out of the office that will mean extra work when he gets back because of all the catching up he will need to do.
Loch Lomond is a good 4 hour drive and he thinks about getting stuck behind the HGV’s on the windy country roads. He hates the slow drive up there and most of the time when he’s done that journey before, the radio always cuts out especially around the Scottish Border. And then there’s all the pesky speed cameras on the A1 to contend with.
He thinks about having to mix with people he doesn’t know, making small talk with the senior management and he doesn’t really know Joe that well either. He’s heard that they plan to have drinks on the lawn on the banks of the Loch, and his friend (probably a jealous one) told him that at that time of year, there’s likely to be swarms of insects that will eat him alive.
He then thinks about the hotel facilities and can’t be bothered with packing extra things for the spa, the pool will probably be cold, and he doesn’t particularly want to be seen in his speedos by other people in his company. Bob was thinking - ‘two days, I mean what will we do for two days?’
And then there’s the awards - what’s the point. The company is just going through the motions. The team in the London office have an unfair advantage because it’s easier to sell down there, they’ve got loads more customers - so one of them is bound to pick up the award.
So, what do you think happens next?
Two-week pass. Bob and Joe attend the award ceremony. Neither of them win. The award goes to one of the salespeople from the London Office.
Then what happens?
They get home. Joe tells his wife about the hotel, the spa, how nice the food was, and wow the views of the Loch and the drive, he really enjoyed the drive. He talks about how great it was to have been recognised by being asked to attend. He felt privileged and was buzzing. What a great company to work for. The whole family feed off his positivity and they have a fantastic weekend.
Bob on the other hand describes it to his partner as a complete waste of time, effort and money. The London lot won, it was always going to be the case. He was right, he knew it. He wasn't just thinking it but he was saying things like "bloody company - and I’ll be back there on Monday trying to catch back up". Unsurprisingly Bob and his partner had a truly dismal weekend.
So what’s the moral of this story?
If everything external was identical – what was different?
Think about it – It’s the same trip, the same spa hotel, the same people, the same opportunity to have a good time – or a miserable time. The choice was entirely theirs. Everything was identical.
So, are we therefore saying that these two individuals created a day in their life through their thinking? Now let's be clear about this - absolutely yes - 100% they did.
Everything external to them was the same. The only difference was in their thinking. Their thinking determined what kind of day they had - their thinking created their reality, and not just for them, but for others around them too.
Here’s some questions to leave you with.
If each of us is able to create a day in our life through our thinking, what possibilities are open to us all?
If you can create a day in your life, what about a week, a month, a year - or even a lifetime?
Remember we have the opportunity to do anything we want. What we chose to do however is another matter. That’s 100% our responsibility.
Think carefully about how you choose to think.
Find Gherkin on LinkedIn at
https://www.linkedin.com/company/gherkin-associates-ltd
Helping People and Businesses Thrive
Glenn Smith – Gherkin Associates Ltd
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